Bobi

Sorry, this entry is only available in Română.

It’s always hard in the beginning, as I’m starting to write, with difficulty, with some insecurity and a bit of fear. I’ve never written a blog before, I’ve never made my thoughts or feelings public.
I’ve always been confident and optimistic, and I’ve always thought that there was no problem that I couldn’t solve by myself. Maybe it is age that gives you this sensation of power, but I’ll leave those who have more experience to talk about it. Even after the accident, after waking up in a hospital bed – paralyzed, with my lungs torn apart, breathing through machines, I continued to believe that I would solve this problem on my own.
Well, my ideas were to change quickly, confidence became unconfidence, power transformed itself into weakness, the inability to do such trivial things that you would have never thought about, for even one second, breaks you down. It’s like rain gnawing at a rock, slowly and surely grinding it without a chance. Now I am aware of needing help, I awoke being “gnawed at by the rain”, with my mind shaken by reality, this time I can’t do it alone, it’s too much, I need your help.
I chose this variant (online) for telling you all this and asking for your help, because it is well suited to my situation: from walking through the city, park or elsewhere with my girlfriend I’ve come to only be able to walk the mouse on the desk, from playing ball with my friends I’ve come to only be able to play on the computer keys.
The restrictions I have, from all points of view, force me to limit myself immensely, I have to be content on a weekend visit, be it from my family or friends, to be content on chatting with them on messenger, facebook or hi5, instead of a cold pint of beer on a terrace in the summer heat, to have my voice tremble with joy whenever I answer the phone to my girlfriend, because I’d thinking about her for days and nights and I miss her so. I feel like a dog in chains, tied to my wheelchair, with a small window (the internet) to a great hope (stem cell transplantation).

This is how I got to write to you here, who would have said it’s so hard…
I wait for you to write me your ideas, proposals, comments, contradictions and whatever cross your mind, I’ll be here, I won’t run anywhere. Also, I’m watching the messages and enjoying them.
Thank you for your help, thank you for everything.

See you soon.